Polite Machinery

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Men’s Rights

Hey, guys, has this ever happened to you? You do something nice for a woman – like hold a door open, or vote for her right to control her own body – and instead of giving you the thanks you rightfully deserve as a MAN, she posts on Facebook that men just need to shut the fuck up about women’s reproductive rights because, well, they aren’t women? How rude!

You don’t have to let those women get the better of you, men. After all, who’s wearing the pants around here, anyway? I mean, women have only had the right to vote for a few years, nowhere NEAR as long as men have – they couldn’t POSSIBLY know what’s best for them. And that’s where you come in, men. Whenever those women try to make you stop mouthing off about their birth control, abortion rights, exclusionary clubs, and various other women-related issues, remind them that they need to be appreciative of all the work you’ve done for them, and that without you they’d have nothing. That should get them back in line pretty quickly! They need to respect you for giving them their place in society, and if they don’t, well, the kitchen could use a good cleaning!

So, just remember, men; your sense of entitlement trumps the very real problems women face every day – make sure you threaten them about not voting for their rights if they make you feel bad. It’s your right, as a man.